MAYrathon 2.0 Day 24 - Attap Fruit in Syrup

I always feel like some day, I'm going to run out of fruit flavors. Some park ranger is going to knock on my door and inform me that I have, indeed, tried every fruit ever. Then I will go retire in Alaska, knock up some hot Eskimo chicks and call it a life. But today's not that day, for I have - Attap Fruit?

Coming to us from Thailand, this is definitely something I've never heard of before and it's not exactly a fruit, or maybe it is? I don't know - it gets really complicated. Attap fruit in its maturity is called the Nipa Palm, populated in the Pacific and Indian Ocean areas. They are a type of palm tree that grow is shallow, muddy waters and can grow to around 30 feet high. The most common use of this plant is not to eat but to make thatching for roofs and buildings, feed its sap to pigs and made into smoking tobacco. Sounds delicious. So how do you eat it? Wikipedia says: "Attap chee (Chinese: 亞答子; pinyin: yà dá zǐ) (chee meaning "seed" in several Chinese dialects) is a name for the immature fruits—sweet, translucent, gelatinous balls used as a dessert ingredient in Thailand, Malaysia, the Philippines, and Singapore."

Well I better break out the can opener because I'm hankering for some gelatinous balls! The opened can is overflowing with syrup, which I'll have to give a taste to as well. I'm going to try and get a few of these white bally things on my fork for a picture. They're odorless, very translucent and blobby. I'm going in for a taste - it's indescribable really. The syrup is thick, not like a fruit cocktail juicy syrup, but almost like a gel. The taste is very slimy and chewy at the same time. It's a bit like a soggy pear chunk or a very, very unripe mango maybe. I don't know - I can see why this isn't an extremely popular fruit. I'm gonna taste a little of the syrup. Thick. Tasteless. Gross. Sorry starving children, this can is going down the garbage disposal.

MAYrathon 2.0 Day 23 - Pepsi Fire

We interrupt our regularly scheduled review where I was going to eat some shitty canned fruit from Thailand to bring you - Pepsi Fire! This one has been on the rumor mill market for weeks now, and I've been keeping my eyes peeled. Today I happened across a 12 pack and had to buy one. If you're a soda freak like me, act fast because Pepsi is only planning to keep it around until the end of June. Which sucks if I end up liking it. But that's Pepsi's M.O., besides the reliable classics, Pepsi will release something new and/or strange, keep it on the market for a bit and then take it away forever. After a humble resurgence, Crystal Pepsi is once again all but a memory. If you look up failed Pepsi products online, there's a crazy long list. Let's take a look at the TOP 5 FAILED PEPSI PRODUCTS:

1. For about a year, Pepsi decided to compete with coffee and came out with Pepsi AM. It was in 1989, so I have no memory of it, and I don't know if it was just Pepsi with a new name or a new formula, but either way, the coffee folk weren't having it.

2. I was very much a fan of Pepsi Next, Pepsi's attempt to dethrone Coke Zero. Paradise Mango was probably my favorite cola soda flavor ever. And then Pepsi just took it off the shelves for reasons unknown.

Remember this one? It came around during Christmas from 2004-2006, but no one cared.

Marketed to the early 2000s rapcore fans with expensive Papa Roach videos, this one never caught on and I doubt many people remember it today.

And...Oh Yea...this ALREADY EXISTED.

That's my biggest issue with this drink. What if I love it? I know, like everything else, it'll be gone sooner than later. Well I have a brand new 2017 Pepsi Fire can in front of me right now, and it's time to see if the gimmick machine has another hit or miss on their hands. The cola, which claims to have natural and artificial cinnamon flavors smells like a regular Pepsi. I'm not getting anything different scent-wise. A couple of gulps in, and yes, I'm a fan. It is exactly what would happen if you dropped an atomic fireball candy into a Pepsi. It's not hot or spicy in any way; but just a smooth, refreshing cinnamon cola. Whisky drinkers - pour a little JD in the can - you won't be disappointed. 

MAYrathon Day 22 - San Francisco Fog Soda

This one is definitely the oldest that I have in my fridge and probably the one I have the least to say about really. I bought this at the same time I tried the grass and dirt sodas which was probably about a year ago. I was going to do some type of Captain Planet elements theme soda marathon, but I got too lazy and threw this one in the back of the fridge for a rainy (or foggy) day. 

Like I said, I don't have a ton to say about this one. I've never been to San Francisco, but I know it's pretty foggy, so...truth in advertising I guess. This is another from Rocket Fizz, and true to their typical form, there's little information given. They did a good job of making the clearish liquid look foggy. It's like sprite but denser. The bottle has a picture of the famous bridge (Old Ben?) and at the bottom tells me to, "Drink Fog." Generic soda ingredients, but the only one that caught my eye is caramel color. That's used in sodas like Dr. Pepper to give it more of a brown texture. But this soda is borderline clear. I'm not sure why that was used. (Old Ben?)

As is typical with Rocket Fizz, it doesn't really say what the flavor is supposed to be, so I guess it's once again up to me to figure it out. Upon opening it and giving it a sniff, it smells like sweetened chemicals. At first, there's a nice scent like the stuff they used to make their marshmallow soda, but immediately after, I'm attacked with a whiff of metallic chemicals. I wonder if it's because it's expired? Oh well, ever onward! (sips). I think this IS the marshmallow soda but with some extra metal. It tastes like marshmallows on the front and the same metal taste on the back that the butter soda had. Weird. I'm gonna just dump this one out. It's almost summer, and I don't want to spend tomorrow vomiting fog particles all over.

MAYrathon 2.0 Day 21 - Ri-Chee Milk Flavor Crunch Snack

Flavors. It's what makes the world unique. If it weren't for flavors, we'd all be drinking water and eating kale and probably living to a fit and trim 110 years of age on average. But we as as species are an indulgent folk, and we love flavors. Your favorite soda? Your favorite beer? Your favorite pizza topping. It's all a personal taste based on its...well...taste. We all enjoy different flavors, and I for one have experienced a ton of them. From crickets to scorpions and teriyaki soda to ox tail soup, I've tasted my fair share of tastes and flavors. But there's one that feels like it should be left alone. One particular flavor that is so unique and yet so normal, that the formula need not be messed with. But today, we cross that path and look at Ri-Chee - a milk flavored snack.

Milk has always been the quintessential - it exists and it's ok drink. While people have spent years adding to it with flavors like chocolate, banana and even marshmallow peeps, I've never seen a food that is meant to taste like milk. What does that even mean? This Philippines snack comes to us from the Nutri Snack company, and here's what it claims on the back: "The only milk you can eat! Imagine your milk as a crunch snack and voila! You have Ri-Chee crunchy snack! It's the crunchy snack you'll enjoy eating with almost the same goodness of your everyday milk, only more delicious!" First of all, Are you really going to introduce the concept of "voila!" to the Philippines? And second, I love that it says ALMOST the same goodness; it's basically saying, "why aren't you just drinking a milk, douche?"

Let's check this bag out. Milk powder is the fifth ingredient along with sugar, coconut, butter, flout and some random chemicals. I bust open the bag, and it's weird to say it, but it smells like milk. I'm actually a little surprised at that. I pop a few in my mouth and I'm at first surprised how sweet it is. I was expecting more of a chip, but this tastes a lot more like a sweetened cereal. It actually tastes just like KIX cereal which I haven't had in ages. I'm shocked how much I like this. It doesn't taste like milk per se, but that may actually be a good thing overall.

MAYrathon 2.0 Day 20 - Pac-Man Power Up Energy Drink

Really quick one today. I am off to the casino with my brother and need to get a little caffeine boost before hitting the road. Which brings me to today's drink - Pac-Man Power Up Energy Drink. Now I've seen, and tasted, a few of these video game celebrity endorsed drinks before. There's Sonic, Mario, Street Fighter, Donkey Kong, etc. And they all come from the same company - The Boston American Corp. I have a feeling they all taste the same too. Like a generic Red Bull most likely.

Well let's get right to it cuz I gotta get on the road. I crack it open and, yep, it smells like a generic red bull. Taste? Energy Drink flavor. That's all I can describe it as. It's an easily crushable 8 oz can and it's not awful, but nothing exciting. People buy these kinds of products because of the celebrity and not the taste. Just ask Hulk Hogan and his Pastamania.

MAYrathon 2.0 Day 19 - Mc Col?

Not really sure what to expect with this one. This is Mc Col, a South Korean Barley Flavored Carbonated Drink. Huh? While I am a fan of beer, my experience with barley in general has not been good. I had one of those Malta Goya drinks once that seem to be popular in Latino cultures, and I thought it was just awful. Even more recently, I had some stupid marmite and wanted to chop off my tongue. So barley and I don't have the greatest track record, but I'm certainly up to the challenge, especially since this pop is pretty much my last name.

According to this guy, I'm sure to love it!

There's not a ton of info online about this soda, but it's apparently Korea's first barley soda, and is often used as an O'Doul's type non-alcoholic alternative to beer. It's described by some as crisp and refreshing while others refer to it as bitter, sour and...fuzzy? And everything I've read on it points to the fact that people love it...eventually. It's an acquired taste that you have to get used to I guess. The 1.5 liter bottle is massive and includes both Korean and English wording. For reasons unknown, their tagline seems to be - "Spark Up!" I don't know if that's just lost in translation or means something different in Korean, but I don't plan to roll this up in a dubester and smoke it outside the Walgreen's. I want to drink it. Ingredients are simply: water, fructose, sugar, carbon dioxide, citric acid, barley extract and natural lemon lime flavor.

Alright, I'm going to try and go for a swig of this massive bottle without cramping up or spilling it on my computer. The smell is none too pleasing. It's essentially dirt. I can smell a little barley, but it's overall just a dirty, rustic smell. Let's go in for a drink...it's...weird. The front end of the taste is Dr. Pepper while the aftertaste is barley, grains and lemons. It's a little like if someone dropped a dollop of marmite into a bottle of Dr. Pepper. Weird. I guess I don't hate it, but I don't think I'll ever look for it again. You get a passing grade, Mc Col, but just barley...I mean BARELY. AHAHAHAHA. 

MAYrathon 2.0 Day 18 - Haepyo Fish Meat Sausage with Cheese

This one is so weird and visual that I'm going to attempt a review using only pictures and captions.

This is Fish Meat Sausage with Cheese. Not JUST a name for a 90s ska band.

Delicious ingredients include frozen surimi, cheddar cheese, cheese flavoring oil, seasoning liquid and fiber gel. YUM!

Take them out of the plastic jar and you see white, globulous sticks encased in plastic and sealed with metal.

gourmet!

The human flesh color really makes it pop

I take a bite and it tastes and smells like old fish sticks dipped in cheese wiz. It sucks.

But as an added bonus, if you manage to digest all 12 of these cheese-meats, you get to convert the jar into a piggy bank. Worth it!

Just terrible...